One step closer......

Hiydeeho peeps!

How I do indeed wish that I was sitting at a vintage type writer and not at a blaring computer screen, but hey ho, you wouldn't be reading this then would you? 

So dear readers, apologies on such a long gap between posts, it's been hectic. But in incredibley good, amazing!!! news!!!! - I have no more credit card debt!!!!

http://www.enemyofdebt.com/the-day-i-killed-my-credit-card/

Oh.My.Giddy.Aunt.

I don't think I ever really fathomed that this was actually possible. I don't remember what it felt like to not have a credit card, to have the debt always and forever hanging over me, making my stomach knot and shedding tears of absolute terror at the depth of the chasm that I had somehow, somewhere fallen into.

So. I've clawed my way out to the top and breathed in a large gasp of fresh air and am now just sitting on the ledge looking back down, letting the sun penetrate my skin.....

Shawshank Redemption

But I'm still at the ledge!?!?!? Any decent (non-masochistic personality) would move the damned hell as far away as possible from that ledge right?

I can't fall down into the chasm of bank debt slavery through credit card again. My accounts are closed, done and definitely dusted. But in the UK, I can apply for an overdraft online, by clicking a few buttons - wha la!! An overdraft is approved. Even worse (if you can believe it!!!) is the fact that I was denied an overdraft when I had over a thousand pounds in my account, but accepted when I was down to five pounds. Dodgy, dodgy and dodgy....

http://www.cartoonstock.com/newscartoons/directory/b/borrower.asp

Seriously, how is that responsible lending. But it also raises the question to my responsibility  also. Money is an emotional matter - pure and simple. This journey has taught me that if nothing else. There is no such thing as cold, hard cash. We attach the myriad of human emotion to money. And it is interesting. It has also been very painful.

I so desperately wanted my last credit card that I had had open since 2003 closed that I put that little bit extra on it this month to close it instead of spreading the cost over two months, being patient and closing it next month. But emotionally I rationalised this very (and there's no other word for it) silly decision because I deserved to feel good, I deserved to finally, once and for all be done with it! Perhaps, also, I feared it may not ever happen. Perhaps.

http://createdinagarden.com/slavery-in-america/fallgardening

So, of course, I was short this month, firstly because I couldn't afford that extra £100 pounds needed to close the account, and partly because even when I'm at my tightest, I still spend frivolously. To be fair, not as frivolously as I used to. I do completely acknowledge how far I've come. I am aware and concious of my body and emotions when I'm buying something I don't want/can't afford. That in itself is a far cry from my old ways of justifying any purchase with I deserve it. But don't I really deserve to be free from the worry and fear of bank debt slavery?? I deserve that more than I deserve a dress, or a book that is very, very possible to obtain through means other than money (swap, barter etc....) or just simply to not buy it - I probably won't even remember the item six months from now, but I'll be living with the consequences of debt for soooooooo much longer (try 11+ years - I'm not clear of all debt yet!)

Add cahttp://www.alainguillot.com/tag/debt/ption

So I've had to get an overdraft of £100 pounds, which means my overdraft fees of £1 per day will be taken out two months down the track - still not free. I'm dangling my feet over the edge of that ledge, dipping my toes back into the dark depths of it's belly. Why? Habit? Emotional comfort? Stockholm Syndrome?

Maybe our motivations and justifications are so deep, so early, so ingrained, that they are just a mystery. Perhaps.

http://wolfcrow.com/blog/notes-by-dr-optoglass-stereoscopy-understanding-depth/

So no credit cards! Huzzah! Still a personal debt, a small overdraft and my student loan (which I'm not counting at the moment....).

Let's have a looksie eh?

http://shellyslittleworld.wordpress.com/

This is where I was and where I am now....

July 2014

1st credit card = $905.03 (paid $94), (£503.95/52.34) PAID!!!!!!!

2nd credit card= $3489.96 (paid off $5383.04), (£1943.34/2997.47)   -$1593.43 (paid off $7206.57) (£876.22/£3962.85)

Debt to family = £4000 ($7183.44/0)  £4330($7874.24)
Overdraft = £300 ($543.78)

Total debt = $10 011.45/£5506.22

November 2014

2nd credit card=$3489.96 (paid off $5383.04), (£1943.34/2997.47)   -$1593.43 (paid off $7206.57) PAID!!!!!!!

Debt to family =  £4330($7874.24) - £4650($)
Overdraft = £100 ($)

Total debt = £4750/$8506

http://www.queenoffree.net/category/31-ways-to-kick-debt-in-the-teeth/

Alright, so a bit has been chipped off, but the HUGE thing is no more cards left. None. Also, there isn't any interest on the family debt, so I'm only paying back what I borrowed. Novel idea, I know.

So everyone, until next time, I'll leave with a couple of favs.....

http://www.queenoffree.net/category/31-ways-to-kick-debt-in-the-teeth/

http://andthenwesaved.com/

PS - the spending fast is !awesome! but I have to work on my emotions and motivations behind my spending habit before I embark on anything like that. I would feel I'm denying myself, and that appears to be my biggest reason for spending/shopping.... but a brilliant idea! In an interview, the blogger for 'And Then We Saved' said this, and it hit the spot.

'SC: What’s your personal favorite resource for money-saving tips and inspiration?

ANJ: I wouldn’t say I have a favorite resource so much as that I have a motto for saving—How can I do what I want to do without spending a single cent? By keeping that question in mind, I come up with clever ways to save throughout every area of my life.'

http://www.smartycents.com/blog-and-then-we-saved/

Thanks for reading!!

One down, two to go....

Hello again peeps!

 So, great news and not so great news since the last post. Good news is that after having secured a new (better paying) job, with the back pay I received I've paid off my credit card (and closed it!!!!!!!!) that was at 21.99% interest, and put a chunk onto the second credit card (chunk is the official term BTW).

 Just. Like. That. 

Whoooo!!

 I thought that there would be some kind of WoW factor to closing it. I felt capable. I felt business-like. I felt adult, which was kinda-cool, kinda-not... but it's done. Mostly, I just felt relief. Some of that ill, stomach-knotting feeling dissipated.

So, where does it all stand now?

May 2014
1st credit card = $905.03 (paid $94), (£503.95/52.34)

2nd credit card= $3489.96 (paid off $5383.04), (£1943.34/2997.47)

Debt to family = £4250 ($7,744.89/0)

Total debt over 12 years = $14050

                                               £ 7709

Total debt now = $12,140

                              £ 6661

 As you may recall, I'm not including the study debt at the moment, so this is where it's at.....

July 2014

1st credit card = $905.03 (paid $94), (£503.95/52.34) PAID!!!!!!!

2nd credit card= $3489.96 (paid off $5383.04), (£1943.34/2997.47)   -$1593.43 (paid off $7206.57) (£876.22/£3962.85)

Debt to family = £4000 ($7183.44/0)  £4330($7874.24)

Total debt = $9467.67/£5206.22

Amount paid off since last post=$9467.67 (£5206.22) minus $9467.67 (£5206.22)

PAID= $2672.21/£1469.71 in 3 months!!!!

Good news, one credit card closed. Bad news, family debt up by £50 and I haven't started to pay that off yet and unfortunately the dreaded OVERDRAFT caught me this month, ba bum!

Ahhhh!

 So, I thought, you know, that I might need it????!!!! What???? So, this month, add £300 to the debt (you read that right folks, I can slam down £300 in the blink of an eye).

So it now stands as:

July 2014

1st credit card = $905.03 (paid $94), (£503.95/52.34) PAID!!!!!!!

2nd credit card= $3489.96 (paid off $5383.04), (£1943.34/2997.47)   -$1593.43 (paid off $7206.57) (£876.22/£3962.85)

Debt to family = £4000 ($7183.44/0)  £4330($7874.24)
Overdraft = £300 ($543.78)

Total debt = $10 011.45/£5506.22

Damn it, that pushed me over into the $10 000 mark!


So, I've got to buckle in because I'm budgeting and planning to have this debt (not my student debt) paid off by the end of January 2015. There it is, in black and white.

Uh-oh - committed to a date!

Time to tighten the belt (or lack thereof - no more clothes shopping unless absolutely necessary (the only thing I could possibly need to buy would be shoes - I don't have that many). No extra luxury foods, recipe plans instead of impulse buys, and making extra for lunch every day. 

I already have one non-buy day a week where I will spend £0.00 (as well as a vegan day each week), so I think I'll up that to three days a week, starting this Monday. Check out my blog on what I'll be doing to save moola (and eliminate chemicals whilst I'm at it, not bad).

So, until next instalment, wish me luck!!

Cha-ching!

Accountable Accounts

Hello peeps! This blog is about my insane misadventures with debt and spending. I am 35 and have had credit card debt since I was 23. Twelve years!!!! The insane thing about it is that I have paid this back and then got into it again!!! I've really been exploring the connection between emotion/personal history/desire/self esteem etc, etc in regards to being in debt and to spending habits and it's been amazing. This blog is to keep myself accountable and to track my progress. 

I've had a love of charity shopping my entire life and finding a bargain has always been almost an obsession (a bargain that was a unique one off!) as well as the environmental side of recycling clothes. I am handy with a sewing machine and alter and make many things so that thriftiness is already there. I love making whatever I can from scratch, firstly to avoid the insanely dangerous chemicals that is added to most modern commercial products (and because I love making things-anything!) and in also in an effort to become more frugal (let's change this to money smart eh?). My spending is purely emotionally driven and I'm blogging to really discover why this is! 

So, to the debt.

1st credit card = $905.03 (paid $94), (£503.95/52.34)

2nd credit card= $3489.96 (paid off $5383.04), (£1943.34/2997.47)

Debt to family = £4000 ($7183.44/0)

Study debt =$17000 (this is not the exact figure as trying to get in touch with the o/s Tax office is hard work!), (£9466.22)

Total debt over 12 years=$33 983 not including interest!!

                                             £18 923

Total debt now =$28 578

                              £15 913

It had gone down immensely until the proverbial emergency hit me in February this year - I had to fly back from the UK to Australia for the death of a close family member. This was the loan from family - I used it to fly back, living money there and back in the UK (as I had to take unpaid leave) and accommodation in some parts of Oz where I did not have family members to stay with and of course food whilst there. The family debt also includes the next step of my visa application. Whilst this means that I didn't spend frivolously to accumulate this debt (which is the case of both of my credit cards- it's a debt (or as Kate Northrup writes, as I too will from now onwards, an Invoice For Blessings Already Received (IFBAR)), I feel way less guilt or shame in having this debt than I do the credit cards. Interesting!

Now to break this down for myself, I am not going to include my study debt at all until my other IFBAR's are paid off in full. Even though it's accumulating interest, it's also a debt that is usually paid off through your salary. I'm no longer working in that country so that won't be happening and I will eventually need to make payments to it, but in order to feel I can achieve anything!! I'm going to keep it on a separate tally and attend to it once the others are dealt with.

The tally now looks something like this:

1st credit card = $905.03 (paid $94), (£503.95/52.34)

2nd credit card= $3489.96 (paid off $5383.04), (£1943.34/2997.47)

Debt to family = £4250 ($7,744.89/0)

Total debt over 12 years = $14050

                                               £ 7709

Total debt now = $12,140

                              £ 6661

I propose to have this total paid off by March next year. The odd thing about my IFBAR is that I'm paying off two different currencies; my salary was way higher when I was earning dollars and I could have (and did!!) pay off the majority off the debt. But pounds are strange, you don't get as many of them, but for some reason they really seem to stretch further! Anyway, card one is the first to tackle - it's at 20.99% and the lovely charts at the bottom of the bill tell you that it will take me something mad like 22 years to pay off if I only pay the minimum payment!!! Then the second card at 12.99% and then debt to the fam at 0% (thanks family!)

Essentially I'll be posting firstly my progress and what it feels like, as well as links to my other blogs about thrifting, refashioning, crafting and other ways to save and make a buck (all the while recycling and helping out the environment!). Being in debt is interesting for me as it's a very, very convenient excuse for me to not start doing all the things I want to do. And I use the word excuse, not reason, very deliberately. It's a very convenient screen to hide behind. By telling myself that I'm focusing on getting this sorted and then getting into more debt (which is my story the past twelve years) instead of recognising the fear of putting myself out there for what it is has conveniently kept me from really getting on with all my creative projects. So this blog will keep me accountable.

Some inspiring blogs to keep me going!!

And Then We Saved

Wise Bread